Pauline Wingelaar is steadfast after losing her daughter: ‘I didn’t expect this’

After a four-week break, Pauline went to Belgium with Beau and Kim as well as all the kids for some distraction. They leave luxury at home because they go Back to basics In a natural park. There is no electricity or heating so they have to chop the wood themselves for the stove. And that’s exactly what Pauline could be using right now. “I sat at home for weeks, on my own. I hid. So I’m really looking forward to going out with my friends again,” she said excitedly to the camera. “Just a mental moment, have fun and laugh with each other in nature. I really need that.”

“At the moment, I feel joy and there is no place for sadness or crying for a while,” she continues. “I’m just having fun with my boys and my girlfriends. A few weeks ago I didn’t think this was possible. I didn’t expect to be able to have fun again so soon. These girls help me so well. (…) I don’t want to cry about it all the time, I want Just to have fun again.”

Although there is a lot of laughter during the flight, Pauline gets emotional when the women are together in the evening. “I was excited to get out, but I was secretly scared too. I’m glad the boys are with me, like…my cuddly teddy bear,” she confessed by candlelight.

At the time of recording, it had only been four weeks since Pauline lost her daughter. “I’d love to take that day back. I’d like to lift my nose up the back of her neck again, smell it again, hold it again…again. But that’s no, because if you get it once, you’ll want it again” , Is learning. “It’s just weird, that’s it.”

Pauline continues, “Sometimes I think: Would I have preferred never to get pregnant or had I not saved this? I don’t know either…On the other hand, I was allowed to see her.”

To the dismay of Pauline, she gave birth to her daughter too early on September 30. Bell was born 21 weeks ago and died of premature birth. Unfortunately, there have been serious complications surrounding my pregnancy for the past two weeks. Exactly in the 20th week, my waters broke… “Daisy” (that’s what I called her in my stomach) and together they fought so hard against nature, because as long as our girl didn’t give up, neither did we…” Pauline said at the time about the heartbreaking news.

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