In 2005, Sander met his radio husband Quinn Swinenberg for the first time. A year later, the two performed their own afternoon show at 3FM and now the gentlemen are baked at Radio 538, where the splitting of roles remains the same: Coen throws the topic in, and Sander leads the joke. The fact that he is now known as the Joker has been a “perfect mask” according to Sander for years.
“It was a way to get into life and get on with life,” he says frankly. He wore the mask that Sander was talking about when his mother died at a young age. Preserving life was mostly his way of dealing with this great grief. “It’s really different now, because I’m also exhausted,” Sander continues. “You can’t keep up. It takes a lot of energy and you lose yourself in it too. At the time I thought it was working fine and it was easy too.”
When his son Klas was born, Sander noticed that he was becoming increasingly sad, when he should have been happier. He says, “I remember when we were in Mirandabad [een zwembad in Amsterdam, red.] We were screaming with joy, but in reality I was feeling sad. I managed to postpone this mourning for 20 years or so. So yes, then came the late mourning as it is called.”
During that time, he also experienced a lot of panic attacks and anxiety: “At a certain point, you really get in trouble with yourself, because you’re afraid that another panic attack will come. And that causes you to panic again.” Sander is now bolder in talking about his feelings, and it’s easier for him to do so. “Now I absolutely love it and stream it a lot,” said the radio producer.
Rooijakkers above ground It can be seen every Thursday at 9.30pm on RTL 4 or see Videoland.
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